Letter of Recommendation and hidden meaning

Letter of Recommendation –

While working with Mr. Xxxxxx, I have always found him working studiously and sincerely at his table without idling or gossiping with colleagues in the office. He seldom wastes his time on useless things. Given a job, he always finishes the given assignment in time. He is always deeply engrossed in his official work, and can never be found chitchatting in the canteen. He has absolutely no vanity in spite of his high accomplishment and profound
knowledge of his field. I think he can easily be classed as outstanding, and should on no account be dispensed with. I strongly feel that Mr. Xxxxxx should be pushed to accept promotion, and a proposal to administration be sent away as soon as possible.

Sd/-

Branch Manager

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A second note following the report:

XXXXXX was present when I was writing the report mailed to you today.
Kindly read only the alternate lines 1, 3, 5, 7,... for my true assessment
of him.

Regards,

Sd/-

Branch Manager

Pop Quiz Triva

The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time television were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.

Coca-Cola was originally green.

Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury.

It is possible to lead a cow upstairs but not downstairs.

Smartest dogs:

1) Scottish border collie;

2) Poodle;

3) Golden retriever.

Dumbest: Afghan hound.

Hawaiian alphabet has 12 letters.

Men can read smaller print than women; women can hear better.

Amount American Airlines saved in 1987 by eliminating one olive from each salad served in first class: $40,000

City with the most Rolls Royce's per capita: Hong Kong  State with the highest percentage of people who walk to work: Alaska

Percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28%

Percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38%

Average number of days a West German goes without washing his underwear: 7

Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.

The world's youngest parents were 8 and 9 and in lived in China in 1910.

The youngest pope was 11 years old.

Iceland consumes more Coca-Cola per capita than any other nation.

First novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.

A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why.

The only 15 letter word that can be spelled without repeating a letter is uncopyrightable.

Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history.

Spades - King David, Clubs - Alexander the Great, Hearts - Charlemagne, and Diamonds - Julius Caesar.

111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321

"I am." is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.

Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older.

Ever wonder....

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on "Start"?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?

Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of a drive-up ATM?

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?

Why does a house burn down and furniture burn up?

Why do they call it a Hot water heater? If the waters already hot, why heat it. It should be called a cold water heater right?

Bad pickup lines

If those old pickup lines aren't working for you like "did it hurt, (she says) what. When you fell from heaven. Then read these pickup lines I guarantee at least one will work for you.

1.Are my undies showing? ["No."] "Would you like them to?"

2.Are you busy tonight at 3:00 A.M.?

3.Can I borrow a quarter? "What for?" I want to call your mother and thank her.

4.Congratulations! You've been voted "Most Beautiful Girl In This Room" and the grand prize is a night with me!

5.Damn, I thought "very-fine" only came in a bottle!

6.Do you have a map? I just keep on getting lost in your eyes.

7.Do you have the time? [Gives the time] No, the time to write down my number?

8.Do you know the essential difference between sex and conversation? (No.) Do you wanna go upstairs and talk.

9.Excuse me, do you think you might possibly have a mutual friend who could introduce us.

10.For a fat chick, you sure have small tits.

11.Gee, for a fat girl you sure don?t sweat much.

12.Have you heard the latest piece of medical knowledge saying that Sex is a real killer? Do you want to die happy?

13.Hi, are you here to meet a nice man or will I do?

14.Hi, I just wanted to give you the satisfaction of turning me down; go ahead say no.

15. Hi, I've been undressing you with my eyes all night long, and think it's time to see if I'm right.

16.Hi. You'll do.

17.How do you like your eggs cooked? [Why?] Well I just wanted know what to make for you in the morning!

18.I don't know what you think of me, but I hope it's X-rated.

19.I hope you know CPR, because you take my breath away!

20.I just wanted to show this rose how incredibly beautiful you are!!

21.I like every muscle in your body, especially mine.

22.I seemed to have lost my way, would you mind taking me with you.

23.I lost my number can I have yours.

24.I was going to tell you a joke that'll make your tits fall off. But it looks like somebody beat me to it.

25.I was just curious? Are you as good as all the guys say you are?

26.If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.

27.If I told you that you had a great body, would you hold it against me?

28.If this bar is a meat market, you must be the prime rib.

29.I'm new in town. Could you give me directions to your apartment?

30.I'm the kind of man who deserves to have women I don't deserve.

Why Men Can't Win...

If you work too hard, there is never any time for her.

If you don't work enough, you're a good-for-nothing bum.

If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay, it's exploitation.

If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your butt
and find something better.

If you get a promotion ahead of her, it's favoritism.

If she gets a job ahead of you, it's equal opportunity.

If you mention how nice she looks, it's sexual harassment.

If you keep quiet, it's male indifference.

If you cry, you're a wimp.

If you don't, you're insensitive. 

If you make a decision without consulting her, you're a chauvinist.

If she makes a decision without consulting you, she's a liberated woman.

If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy, that's domination.

If she asks you, it's a favor.

If you try to keep yourself in shape, you're vain.

If you don't, you're a slob.

If you buy her flowers, you're after something.

If you don't, you're not thoughtful.

If you're proud of your achievements, you're an egotist.

If you're not, you're not ambitious.

If she has a headache, she's tired.

If you have a headache, you don't love her anymore.

 

Friendship Test

First things first: 

NO CHEATING Don't cheat. 

This is a little game that has a pretty funny/creepy outcome. Don't read ahead, just do it in order. It takes about 3 minutes It's worth it.
It's kinda eerie.... 

First, Get a blank piece of paper and pen. 

P.S. When you are asked to choose names, make sure it's people you ACTUALLY KNOW, and go with your first instincts! 

Scroll down one line at a time - don't read ahead or you'll ruin the fun!! 

1.) First, write the numbers 1 through 11 in a column. 

2.) Then, beside numbers 1 and 2, write any two numbers you want. 

3.) Beside the 3 and 7, write down the names of members of the opposite sex (or same sex if you're gay). Don't look ahead-or it won't turn out right. 

4.) Write anyone's name (like friends or family...) in the 4th, 5th and 6th spots. Don't cheat or you'll be upset that you did. 

5.) Write down four song titles in 8, 9, 10 and 11. 

6.) Finally, make a wish
And here is the key for that game.. 

1.) You must tell (the number in space 2) people about this game 

2.) The person in space 3 is the one that you love. 

3.) The person in 7 is one you like but can't work out. 

4.) You care most about the person you put in 4. 

5.) The person you name in number 5 is the one who knows you very well. 

6.) The person you name in 6 is your lucky star. 

7.) The song in 8 is the song that matches with the person in number 3. 

8.) The title in 9 is the song for the person in 7. 

9.) The tenth space is the song that tells you most about your mind. 

10.) And 11 is the song telling how you feel about life.

 

Husband store

Recently a "Husband Store" opened where women could go to choose a husband from among many men. It was laid out in five floors.

The only rule was, once you opened the door to any floor, you HAD to choose a man from that floor; if you went up a floor, you couldn't go back down except to leave the place, never to return. A couple of girlfriends went to the shopping center to find some husbands...

First floor

The door had a sign saying, "These men have jobs and love kids." The women read the sign and said, "Well, that's better than not having a job or not loving kids, but I wonder what's further up?" So up they went.

Second floor

The sign read, "These men have high paying jobs, love kids, and are extremely good looking." "Hmmm," said the ladies, "But, I wonder what's further up?"

Third floor

This sign read, "These men have high paying jobs, are extremely good looking, love kids and help with the housework."
"Wow," said the women, "Very tempting." But there was another floor, so further up they went.

Fourth floor

This door had a sign saying "These men have high paying jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking, help with the housework and have a strong romantic streak."
"Oh, mercy me," they cried, "Just think what must be awaiting us further on! So up to the fifth floor they went.

Fifth floor

The sign on that door said, "This floor is empty and exists only to prove that women are impossible to please. The exit is to your left."

 

The Rules

1. The female always makes the rules.

2. The rules are subject to change at any time without prior notifications.

3. No male can possilby know all the rules. Nearly all females are born
with this knowledge.

4. If the female suspects the male knows the rules she may immediately
change some or all the rules.

5. The female is never wrong.

6. If the female is wrong, it is because of a misunderstanding, which is the direct result of a male having said or done something wrong.

7. If rule #6 applies, the male must immediately apologize for the misunderstanding.

8. The female can change her mind at any given point in time.

9. The male can never change his mind without the express written consent
of a female.

11. The female has every right to be upset or angry at any time.

12. The male must remain calm at all times, unless the female wants him to
be angry or upset.

13. The female must under no circumstances let the male know whether or
not she want him to be angry or upset.

14. Any attempt to change the rules could result in severe bodily harm.

Fortune Cookies

• Try a new system or different approach.
• How you look depends on where you go.
• He who has imagination without learning has wings but no feet.
• You will be called to fill a position of high honor and responsibility.
• There is yet time enough for you to take a different path.
• You will inherit some money or a small piece of land.
• You will travel far and wide, for both pleasure and business.
• Follow a hunch about improving your position.
• A vacation by the sea is in store for you soon.
• To see others, you must only watch; to see yourself, you must look.
• You are interested in public service and would make an outstanding statesman.
• You will meet an important person who will help you advance professionally.
• You will be advanced socially, without any special effort on your part.
• Your energy is at a peak. Channel it into fun activities.
• Now is a good time to start something new.
• You are bright. So give out that light!
• Generosity and perfection are your everlasting goals.
• Finding exotic uses for what others ignore will make your special fortune.
• Someone thinks you are very special and lets you know it.
• Share excitement with your best friends as you all run away for the weekend.
• You have many personal talents that are attractive to others.
• The most important things in life are not things.
• An aura of glamour and mystery surrounds your events of the week.
• Your pet project gains seal of approval from an influential friend.
• An important visitor will vow complete support.
• You will receive credit long overdue.
• Love will come looking for you.
• Anyone who makes a blanket statement is a fool.
• Happiness and good fortune will come to you soon.
• You have the ability to make lifelong friends.
• Live each day to the fullest.
• You have an optimistic outlook on life, for very good reason.
• Cooperate with those who have both know-how and money.
• Any active moves you make tomorrow will succeed.
• The path to enlightenment requires open eyes and willing feet.
• Remain resolute and unwavering toward your goals.
• Helping others can become a satisfying way of life.
• Your Yin and your Yang are in harmony.
• Wise men learn much from fools.
• Prayers are always answered eventually.
• Your future will be easier to digest than this cookie.
• If it wasn't for the last minute, nothing would get done.
• The sooner you get behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
• The only constant since the beginning of time is change.
• Those who speak loudest always have the least to say.
• Time exists solely to prevent everything from happening at once.
• Blessed are the meek, for they make great scapegoats.
• Malice is stupidity raised to a higher power.
• Put off procrastinating till a later time.
• It's easier to curse a candle than to light the darkness.
• Moderation in all things should be practiced sparingly.
• People who spout platitudes have attitudes that allow no latitude.
• You will be unusually successful in business.
• You are generous, affectionate and impulsive.
• Keep your schedule flexible to handle the unexpected.
• You should be able to undertake and complete anything.
• Pray for what you want, but work for the things you need.
• Good health is a man's best wealth.
• You will step on the soil of many countries.
• You are entering a time of great promise and overdue rewards.
• You will soon gain something you have always wanted.
• Avert misunderstandings by calm, poise and balance.
• You need not worry about your future.
• You will be showered with good luck.
• If you can shape it in your mind, you will find it in your life.
• You have creative power to achieve your aim.
• You will succeed, but wait for the opportune moment.
• The physician heals; nature makes well.
• Try to clear up differences with associates.
• You will soon be holding the lucky number.
• You will make a change for the better.
• Sell your ideas - they are totally acceptable.
• There is no way of judging the future but by the past.
• You will be singled out for promotion.
• Adopt a confident, positive attitude and others will climb on your bandwagon.
• The coming month shall bring winds of change in your life.
• A handful of patience is worth more than a bushel of brains.
• You have a natural grace and great consideration for others.
• You will witness a special ceremony.
• Confucius say: Angel with wings not so hot as angel with arms.
• A short trip is favored at this time.
• You will be offered a high executive position with an attractive salary.
• You will make many changes before settling satisfactorily.
• You are deeply attached to your family and home.
• Hope for the best, but prepare for the worst.
• You are faithful in the execution of any public trust.
• Whatever your desires are, for the present decline them.
• You long to see the great pyramids in Egypt.
• You will be traveling and coming into a fortune.
• You will be an honored guest at a pleasant social occasion.
• You will be recognized and honored as a community leader.
• Confucius say: make sure words touch wisdom tooth on way out of mouth.
• Your business superiors have you in mind for a promotion.
• Add to your understanding of foreign art and culture.
• An emptiness soon will be filled.
• You will be fortunate in the opportunities presented to you.
• Too much confidence has deceived many a one.
• Your partner will be proud of you.
• You should be pleased with answers you are given now.
• Good news will come to you from far away.
• Good news will come to you from close at hand.
• You are heading for a land of sunshine.
• You will soon have an opportunity to make a change to your advantage.
• The color red will be important to you.
• You will receive a favor or kindness from someone.
• It is good to be neither high nor low. Come easy, go easy.
• Don't let doubt and suspicion bar your progress.
• Consolidate rather than expand business projects in the near future.
• You can breeze through most of the day.
• You will pass a difficult test that will make you happier.
• Blue eyes shall bring happiness as deep as the seas.
• Answer just what your heart prompts you.
• You can solve your problem if you exert yourself.
• Be tactful; overlook not your own opportunity.
• Children could contribute to your cheerfulness.
• Your genuine talent will find its way to success.
• He asks advice in vain who will not follow it.
• Simplicity and clarity should be your theme in dress.
• You will dance to a different beat next summer.
• Be the first to try something new.
• A woman who seeks to be equal to men lacks ambition.
• Idleness is the holiday of fools.
• A beautiful woman is a paradise to the eyes and a curse to the purse.
• You will visit some faraway land that has long been in your waking thoughts.
• Deception in romance will prove costly.
• Things just get curiouser and curiouser.
• Have you had your reality check today? Don't worry, it's in the mail.
• Happiness isn't all it's cracked up to be.
• Nothing is better than happiness, but a ham sandwich is better than nothing.
• Love will come looking for you, with an angry spouse.
• Reality will be less painful than usual today.
• Reality is the leading cause of stress, for those in touch with it.
• Life to you is a series of dashing and adventurous crises.
• Any problem in your home can be fixed, except that leaking faucet.
• Cooperate with those who have both know-how and bail money.
• Any active moves you make tomorrow will backfire, so stay home.
• The path to enlightenment requires a flashlight with fresh batteries.
• The secret of life is...I can't tell you. It's a secret.
• Remain resolute and unwavering when shirking your duty.
• Somewhere is lurking a hailstone that has your name on it.
• Your emotional ties aren't color coordinated with your suits.
• Threatening forces oppose your move to Cleveland.
• A libertarian, immoral society is enticing you to excesses. Enjoy.
• Your Yin and your Yang are no longer on speaking terms.
• If at first you don't exceed, try, try again.
• To err is human, to forgive is unlikely.
• It's okay to call someone stupid; just don't prove it.
• If justice rules the universe, we are all in trouble.
• There ain't no such thing as a free lunch, unless you own the restaurant.
• Wise men learn much from fools. Wise guys don't.
• You will live in interesting times and, if lucky, survive them.
• Prayers are always answered. The answer is usually no.
• The race is not always to the swift, but that's the way to bet.
• The best revenge is not living well. The best revenge is revenge.
• A rose by any other name would still attract aphids.
• Someday your ship will come in, but you'll be at the airport.
• A bird in the hand can be messy.